He asked to "fluff my boner.."
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
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