can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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