Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
