I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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