I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Randomize
