i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
