Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
