the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
