We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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