everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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