so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
