My brain says no but my pants say off.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Randomize