we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical�
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize
