still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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