I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
