I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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