were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
