And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
