i just google imaged poop.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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