I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Randomize
