hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
You smell like stripper and shame
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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