good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
