We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
