My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
