What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
