i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Randomize
