Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
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