p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
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