the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
