At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Randomize
