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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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