I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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