I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Can you bring me the toilet please
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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