He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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