so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
