I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize