I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize