I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
from now on my penis is your penis
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Randomize
