when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
