I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Life is so much better after having sex.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
