Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize