his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
