is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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