Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
Randomize
