I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
