thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
