haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
