so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
smell my finger.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Randomize
