he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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