it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
