physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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